I think it just happened this way but everythin in conversation today involved stuff that happened in the past. And right at this moment, it's trippin me out.

You know when you've completely forgotton about somethin til someone mentions it and you're like, whoa...I have a vague memory of it...and then it slowly blows your mind?

Remember when they had chocolate Hubba Bubba back in the day? Crazy!

I feel like I should be on the road to somethin. Like there's somethin I hafta get out of my own way to get there.

I think I'm always waitin for somethin to be over and yet still always waitin for somethin to come.

I have this way of dealin with things that bother me...I just don't think about it. I know it's a lot harder for other ppl to just push aside their thoughts cuz they just can't help it but I dunno, it's not even an issue for me sometimes. If I don't wanna be thinkin about it, then I don't. Just fuck it.

It was kind of a bizarre day, yes. Maybe it's just me, haha. I'm just weird :P

L had to go go go out and doin somethin so badly that she wouldn't even let me go wash my hair as I was prepared to just as she called. We went to the mall to pick up some things and then raced G to her own house as she got off work. Then we all hit Timmy's for some catch-up since we haven't really seen eachother for a week. After that, we went to P's cuz she's goin to NY tomorrow for a week. Everybody's goin in and out these days. Hey, you know what that just reminded me of? That old S.E. Hinton book "Tex". The character Tex and his gf went to see a fortune teller and told them who was 'one of those who was stayin' and 'one of those who was leavin'. I loved S.E. Hinton books. I think I read all of her novels in hs. Who didn't love "The Outsiders"?

I'm talkin a whole buncha shit. That'll 'bout do it for today, gooooooood night!

I guess there'll be posts around noon time now cuz I'm forced to get up, haha. Oh well, it's probably better for me. It gives me more purpose to my day...that's what the moms would say :P

Too bad Binx and Mags aren't on AMC anymore so there's no point in catchin the show at 1! I can't believe Eden and Liz are gone for good. It sucks without BAM. And their last eppy wasn't even all that! Disappointed fan here. It was sweet but damn, ppl...no kiss or even any classic soap opera "I love you and I'm IN love with you!" dramatics. It coulda been SO GOOD.

After I dropped my bro at school, I swung by Futureshop and picked up The Game and 50's CDs :) Both for $23...nice. Diggin that gangsta rap! I love gettin new CDs, I have so much to listen to. Esp hot shit, I get excited, haha. I got the deluxe edition of 50's album and the normal one of The Game, they didn't have his deluxe one with his son on the cover. At least it was the explicit version. I'm like, damn right it better at least be explicit...am I gonna pay for his CD with all the blank-outs and blips? Pointless.

Hey here's a good thing...I've stopped smokin. This isn't exactly news but I've realized that I really can't take it up again. And notice I didn't say quit, cuz I wasn't really addicted. I know, words of an addict. But I wasn't a hardcore smoker, just social. I'd buy my own packs every now and then and have a cig when I was waitin in line or at the clubs or whatever. I'd maybe have 2 or 3 in a day...couple times I'd do half a pack on a particularly exciting or stressful day...sometimes I would have just 1 smoke during the week. Then buyin smokes got pricey and I just cut down the times I had a cig. Then I stopped buyin my own packs. Then I didn't have a cig cuz I just didn't have any on me and I wasn't gonna buy some just for one smoke. It got hard sometimes cuz I really wanted one but I slowly phased it out. Plus there was the new no-smokin law in bars and clubs so there wasn't a choice there. So recently, I had 1 or 2 here and there. Now I'm confident that I won't be smokin smokin again cuz I can't take to it anymore. Yay for no lung cancer. My body makes its own choices that way...like how I can't take alcohol well :P I'm 'lucky' that way, haha.

Wonder what's goin down for tonight. Ooh, we gotta go sledding before the snow goes, haha. Tho somehow I don't think a lack of snow will be a problem these days. Chris should be back from Waterloo today and will be home for the weekend. She visited Jason in Austin last week. Dinner tomorrow should be fun...we'll make up stories of Texan cowboys and guns and J's new skill at line-dancin.

When's the last time anyone saw a post from me at this time of day? :P Had to drive the bro around again but at least I got the Benzo!

There's a buncha concerts I wouldn't mind goin to but then, that's exactly what they are...shows that I wouldn't mind, not really ones I want to see badly. If I was rich, I'd go to all of them. Discover the span of my musical tastes, haha--Ashlee Simpson, Kelly Clarkson, Garbage. The most I'd want to go to out of them all would be The Game. There's gonna be a few DJs on before him cuz it's Guv's Fri night so it should be sick. We'll see. Kim wants to see Alicia Keys at Casino Rama, A wants to see the Gipsy Kings, and Pris wants to see Michael Buble :P

Not much more exciting than the last post but I haven't done anythin crazy between that time and now. After takin my brother back to school from co-op (ah man, gettin up at 11 hurts me), I called L back to say that I wanted to go to Vaughan Mills with her after all. It's that really big new mall that's got a bowling alley and a race track and other cool shit like that. L wasn't gonna go if I wasn't and I'm like, aww...well you can now cuz I'm comin! Even tho she said she wouldn't go back there cuz it was crazy busy and crowded when she went (but that was Christmas time :P).

It's nothing too special but there's a lotta stores that I've never seen/heard of before, maybe they're American or somethin, I dunno. We were gonna eat at Johnny Rockets, which is this '50s diner type place but it was a bit pricey and we just settled on good ol' cheap food court Taco Bell :P That woulda been hype tho...I love '50s stuff. Malts, haha...awesome.

I wasn't really lookin for somethin to buy but I came out with nuthin still. Neither did L so that meant hittin another mall. I still couldn't even get some bus tickets.

50 Cent's CD is out tomorrow. There's somethin I can buy!

My dinner tonight consisted of 2 cups of coffee and Lipton Sidekick noodles. I know I didn't get up at an cruel and disgusting hr but mall-walkin for hrs gets me tired. And sittin in L's car while she's got the heat CRANKED so that I'm rotisserating makes me sleepy.

I chatted with Jay last night on Messenger, before my internet crapped out on me. L thinks he's lyin about havin a gf, haha. If she exists, wouldn't it be funny if we all ended up friends or some crap like that? I wouldn't mind.

It's March. Wow. The weather still sucks monkey butt. I'm gonna hafta drive that ingrate turd that is my brother tomorrow. Take the bus! I do! Whatever, anythin happens to the car, it's not on me :P

I think I hafta call whoever that was that left a msg about witnessing an accident. I'm assuming it was about Fri. Oh man, I really hope they don't ask me what I think happened.

This post was just pointless. I apologize for its retardedness. A better one should follow.

Damn, I'm clearly gonna get my rag soon. I know that's not a great way to start a post but it's my blog so eat it. I hate Tuesdays. Not generally, cuz I love cheap movie nights and sweet deals at Taco Bell and Second Cup and other such food services one would find at the mall, but cuz I have class. Everythin seems to go badly whenever I hafta go to school. Coincidence?

I had to get bus tickets to get to school this morning. I get them either at the pharmacy or the convenience store in the plaza down the block across the bus stop. The pharmacy's closed today for some reason and the store's all out. Bitchin hell. So I bought some M&Ms at the store to make change. The dude at the cash woulda stiffed me $5 if I didn't check the change he gave back. Friggin guy.

Then of course the bus I'm ridin becomes a short turn bus and I hafta get off for another one. The service today was unbelievable. Granted it's snowy out but damn, they are not convincin me that 'the TTC is the better way'. I even went to bed earlier than I ever had for this class (even tho I couldn't sleep til 3-4 anyway) and got up earlier than I ever had for this class, but I was still laaaaate.

Anyway, I was in a mood after class but I'm not anymore. I think I was just overly emotional. Which maybe would explain the following:

I was actually gonna participate today. I thought out my comment and was all ready to speak. I was just waitin for the other ppl to finish what they were sayin, to find a window to say somethin (these 2 specific ppl, I don't think they're physically capable of knowin when to stop talkin...I'm not sayin that cuz I'm mad, I'm just sayin :P). But then I got all panicky. I noticed I was shaky and my heart was beatin fast, I needed to take deep breaths to calm myself. What the hell was that about??? I was so mad at myself. I just wanted outta there. I didn't go to photocopy the next week's readings, I just jetted to the bus stop. I was pretty calm up to that point when I got all nervous...til I was juuuuust about to speak. I hate these forced participation points. I just don't have anythin to say. I feel like it's just an opportunity to showcase...it's too presented, you know? BLAH.

Wow I haven't had a stay-in weekend in a long time. Fri night was an ordeal. Sat consisted of readings, some workin out, and watchin tv. Today I went to school to do that photocopyin shit. I figured it was better to do it today rather than tomorrow cuz it's supposed to snow like a mofo on Mon. Plus I realized that this week, it was group 3's (my) turn to hand in questions for the readings so I better do it. Watched some of the Oscars...was alright.

This weekened was kinda surreal. I don't think I woulda been able to go out at all anyway seein that I can't afford it :P I talked to G. Her car's in the shop and she's got a rental to drive around but it's some monster Chrysler Sebring.

I don't wanna get into the scream-fest that was goin on here either. Geezus. I just wanna...shed the last couple days, you know? It's like a bad air that's on me. And it's gonna snow all week so that's just fantastic.