Me, Vick, and L went to Timmy's yesterday til 1 am. I gotta stop goin to bed at like 3-4 in the morning. It always reminds me of 2 summers ago tho. Goin to sleep as you hear birds chirpin outside, haha. Good times.

Somethin's goin on with me. You know summa those days when nuthin could be more perfect, everythin is goin amazing...and then you have those days when you have that feelin like somethin's wrong or naggin at you that you hafta fix somethin? Meh, maybe that's me. I think I'm havin that...I dunno...like somethin's missing. Hmmm, I just realized how that sounded. Like I'm in a sort of midlife crisis...but that's not possible since I'm not even 24. Quarter-life crisis? Well, somethin's buggin me and I'm not sure what it is. But I don't think it's a work/career/school/future kinda deal this time around. I'll always give you the truth. Not so much in the brutal honesty type of way when ppl ask how does this look or what do you think of my bf or how about this idea. I mean, I'm not exactly an open book and I'll tell you everythin I think about any subject, but I'll never front about stuff that matters.

I really do have crappy luck. I don't mean that in a pessimistic, oh-why-me, the world's out to get me way. Shit just usually doesn't go my way, haha. But you know what they say about only know what you're used to. So actually, I don't mind it too much. Like, things could be a lot worse...and a LOT of ppl experience that. Really, who am I to complain when I have my health, a roof over my head, and food on the table? (Might I add that I'm only grateful to be able to breathe and function normally after I'm sick as hell...so simple to just be without any misery.) Still, I tend to think about other ppl's problems. I feel down when other ppl are down. Maybe that's what's botherin me...that I know other ppl are hurtin. Well I've always known that cuz well, look at what's goin on in the world, but I mean ppl around me. As much as I say that the majority of ppl are stupid or ignorant or whatever not so optimistic outlook I have on the general human population sometimes, I can't stand seein ppl in pain. I really don't like it. Yeah I think that's what it is. I'm not blatantly seein it but I know it. If I can't have this like, amazing life, at least let someone else have it. Someone who deserves it. It's like beauty goin to waste. "Steal your pain"...if only that was possible.

I know I seem like I don't care about most things (and not like I don't care as in what's the point in life? cuz that's just scary depressing), I'm just apathetic I guess? I like to call it bein laid-back :P Keep in mind tho, just cuz I might not show it, doesn't mean I'm not feelin it. I don't hafta be like other ppl, right...I have things that are my way, and I do the things I do cuz I'm me...so whatever, haha. I'm not tryin to sound like scolding or anythin, I'm just explainin. Tellin ya like it is ya know...these are facts about me.

I remembered to write about the Dalai Lama bein in Toronto over the weekend. I read in the paper about what he talked about.

"It's not enough to show compassion to the people you love, he said — that's self-interest and that's easy."

Haha I'm so preachy. Apparently I'm in a profound post mood today.

Anyhoo...game 3 on home ice tonight. Please let the Leafs win! Go blue and white!